Breaking Stereotypes: In search of a risk-free MBA Grad

After having spent a year in a B-school with only few months left to go, I believe that 1 or 2 years is a significant part of one’s life. ‘Experience’ is probably the right word in my opinion. Treat these 2 years as an experience and you shall probably make the most of it. However, flipping through the pages of the past, all that comes to my mind are the myriads of human instincts in an MBA college. Call it following tradition or basic human behavior, we all fit into at least one of these categories. If we don’t, we obviously are not a risk-free MBA student… rather someone breaking stereotypes, someone I’m yet to meet.

The Do-it-All s

Most common in the first year and more so in the first term. Over enthusiasm and insecurity fuel this situation. Yes, it is always good to be an all rounder and one should do a variety of things. However, there is a difference between doing things to make up the numbers and doing things well.  You might end up screwing your academics, causing serious harm to your relationships… this I say after seeing relationships getting bitter and the thread snap for silly reasons like committee selection process.

The CV Point Seekers

Almost all actions are driven by incentives in a B-School and the herd will end up doing all those things they think adds value to their resume. If people started thinking about what adds value to them rather than their resume, quality of activities conducted on campuses would be so much better. People choose courses/electives thinking about what will look good 1 year later. They are ready to endure a poor professor, a course not fit for them and the painful experience of actually studying it because of resume value.

There is a weird concept of a ‘hygiene’ factor in a resume. So, if a few people are doing certifications others want to do it so that their resume isn’t less attractive. Everyone wants one bullet point in their Resume which says you have been part of the management festival and one bullet point on the cultural festival. People manufacture imaginary clubs and societies in their undergrad years. It comes to a point where resumes start looking so similar, the perceived benefits of the above bullet points become almost non-existent.

The Free Loaders

It is a well-known concept in B-Schools. A person who does not contribute at all in a group but gets equal credit by virtue of him/her being in that group is a free-rider. People basically free ride on the insecurity of the scared group member who is concerned about his/her grade. They free ride because they are lazy and see no value being added by working on assignments or presentations.

The Grade Maniacs

Grades may be important for some; may not be important for others. But the third kinds of students are simply crazy about the 0.25 marks they fall short of the maximum. Grades shape up their mind, body and soul!

We have the same feather… let’s flock together

You’re my Bong friend… let’s go look out for fish somewhere! And they spend the remaining days in college fantasizing about fishes and sondesh.

Hey! Join Marcom party tonight! Mind you, it is not any marketing committee party… Marcom = Marathi Committee!

And many more… regionalism is like an identity.

I never raise my hand

In a collectivist society that prevails in India, it is difficult to voice an independent opinion.  And this is where a majority of students, I know, fall.

A number of movies have shown “The Road Not Taken” as a scary path to walk on – full of shocks, hardships and difficulties that will spring upon you out of nowhere, a dangerous route where every step needs to be taken with supreme care. And we, the current Indian student generation, consider the vision shown by these movies as the truth. Thus, we live all our lives, trying to follow the footsteps of previously successful people who have gone down “The Road Most Taken”. And as I write this bit, I seriously wonder where do I fit? In this situation, I cannot expect a utopian transformation to occur in this generation, obviously not me. And after a 10 seconds thought I pen down… Of course, I, too, am a risk-free MBA student.

For all I can do is appreciate Robert Frost

“Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth…”

Manage Your Annoying Roommate with a Submissive Destructive Letter

(Picture Source: www.wikihow.com)

In this season of summer internship, where most budding managers from the top B-schools step into enterprises to get a brief taste of their lives after college, they also spend a considerable amount of time and energy looking for PGs, flats and roommates. Thus begins a strange experience wherein they have to share their food, bills, living space, etc. They soon realize there is no spoon away from the comfort zone of friends and family. They make new friends. And after the first few rosy days, they get to see unwashed plates in the sink, stinking socks and unhygienic washroom manners to name a few. In a week they feel like going back to the same life… the same sleepless nights, the night mess coffee and the drowsy classes. Good manners, fear of losing roommates, fear of bills and rising price or merely having to spend two months anyhow and leave help them maintain such brevity.

(Source: www.wikihow.com)

Almost everyone has told us that the fact that you made it to particular b-school itself proves that you are on par with anyone else. We might find math-based subjects easy, marketing frameworks on our finger tips and corporate bond concepts simple… but in real life could one year in a b-school make us good managers? It is testing time for us… how well we can handle the trivial things in our daily life. Here’s my experience. One of my roommates have this terrible habit of leaving unwashed dishes near the sink (God knows for whom).

(Source: www.wikihow.com)

I used my writing skills to make that straight. So here’s my passive aggressive/ submissive destructive letter writing technique for those who want to revolt*

*at their own risk

 

(Source: www.izifunny.com)

Steps:

1. Type a letter

2. Address the intended recipient as if you have no clue who they might be

3. Use anthropomorphism – (Anthropomorphism is a form of creative writing which involves the attribution of human characteristics or behavior to a god, animal, or object)

4. State the obvious

5. Suggest highly improbable consequences

6. Suggest a solution to a problem in a way that patronizes a reader

7. Deflect your thoughts to a secondary source

8. Use overly dramatic punctuation

9. Place note in a completely inappropriate place

(Source: www.wikihow.com)

And cheers to what I wrote.

Sub: “To whoever is leaving tuna encrusted plates in the sink”

 The plates may not have told me that they hate it when they stink. You may, however, not be aware that dishes do not have automatic self cleaning function in order to effectively clean and sanitize a plate as well as a gang of stray cats overrunning the house. Try this method as described on ehowwhatwhen.com. I found it amazing.

1.      Take the dish.

2.      Take the scrubber (a green colour scrubbing pad kept near the kitchen window)

3.      Pour some liquid soap on the scrubber

4.      Use water and rub the scrubber on the dish (it takes a little effort, I understand. But you know how life is unfair!)

5.      Wash the dish

Thanks

We are running short of dish soap and it is your turn to buy the next bottle

Being a little ironical never hurts. You continue to be the thoughtfully gullible, the willingly clumsy, the skillfully frenetic, woeful survivors on milk and cornflakes, an unbelievable combination of always-in-a-hurry nerds and unpredictable times. But in the midst of all the bad things life offers… this is like a splendid endeavor you’ll do for the society at large. Do try this out in case it applies and of course, let us know.

And just as I’m about to finish writing this, I realize that this is enough dose of faking news for one article.

(Source: www.scoop.it)

Rabindrasangeet and MBA – A Surprising Correlation

The other day when we were taught some practical applications for probability theory in our finance class, my background in music came in surprisingly handy. I am obviously indebted to my lessons from early childhood in music, sitar and guitar that have added a special flavor to my CV. But it’s obviously not just this. My knowledge in music gives me much more than just a diploma certificate and I am stunned at the kind of correlation I have lately discovered between music and MBA.

In probability theory, a stochastic process, or sometimes random process is a collection of random variables; this is often used to represent the evolution of some random value, or system, over time. It’s something we talk a lot about in QAM and finance classes. I realized that I knew the concept already, not because of an engineering background, but because of my early music classes. The point is that I had a very different association when we were learning how to value an European call option on a bond.

On the first day to Marketing Management-I Prof. Debashish Dasgupta (DDG) mentioned, “The first rule for being an awesome marketer is Sabse Bura Rog, Kya Kahenge Log”. How close DDG’s words lookedto what I grew up learning! In the words of the song by Tagore:

(Topic : Prakriti / Sharat, Taal : Dadra, Raag : Behag-Kirtan, Written on : 1921)

“Tomra Ja bolo tai bolo

Amar lage na mone”

(I don’t bother whatever you may say.

I enjoy, time pass by, all in vein, wasted.)

Basanti Utsob on the occasion of Holi in Shantiniketan

Apart from marketing management, I’ve found a very strong link in one of the Rabindrasangeets to the HR concept of leadership and motivation.

(Topic : Swadesh, Taal : Dadra, Raag : Baul, Written on : 1905
Notes : In support to the movement against the partition of Bengal)

“Jodi tor daak shuna keu na ashe

Tobe ekla cholo re”

(If they answer not to thy call, walk alone.

If they are afraid and cower mutely facing the wall.)

And more so in the following song

(Topic : Bichitro, Taal : Kaharwa, Raag : Iman, Written On : 1929)

“Nai bhoy nai bhoy nai re

Thak pore thak bhoy baire”

(There’s no fear… let fear stay outside)

The Jorasanko Thakur Bari (Bengali: House of the Thakurs (anglicised to Tagore) in Jorasanko, north of Kolkata, West Bengal, India, is the ancestral home of the Tagore family

And another (Topic : Bichitro, Taal : Kaharwa, Raag : Bhairavi, Written On : 1926)

“Nai nai bhoy

Hobe hobe joy

Khule jabe ei dwaar”

(Fear not, for thou shalt conquer,

Thy doors will open, thy bonds break.

Often thou loseth thyself in sleep,

And yet must find back thy world

Again and again.)

Not just these, I feel Rabindrasangeets prepare you for the difficult roads and choices ahead of us. For instance,

(Topic : Puja, Taal : Dadra, Raag : Baul, Written on : 1929)

“Amar pothe pothe pathor chorano

Tai to tomar bani baje jhorna jhorano”

And whenever I feel pressure of strict deadlines, tough schedule, morning classes, quizzes… sometimes when less marks make it seem that nothing is left, everything is out of my hands, I sing to myself

(Topic : Puja, Taal : Kaharwa, Raag : Mishra-Khambaj, Written on : 1914)

“Shesh nahi je shesh kotha ke bolbe

Aaghat hoye dekha dilo, aagun hoye jolbe”

(There’s no end to anything… clouds end and form rains… snow ends and begins a river… all that ends, ends only in our eyes, which crosses the barriers of darkness to meet with the light.)

Music offers me an opportunity to develop my management skills. Is it because the two are linked? I don’t know. Certainly there is some overlap between the two.

Learning from Mahabharata at IIM Lucknow

The Mahabharata is a vast ocean of knowledge. We can always pick pearls of wisdom. Its significance lies in the fact that its lessons are as applicable in practical, realistic terms as they were thousands of years ago as they will be thousands of years later.

In a B-school, most of us spend the two years running after CV points. You win or lose, the chase never stops. Just like kings from the times of Kauravas and Pandavas practiced polygamy. They attended multiple swayamvaras, some had won, some had lost… but the chase continued. We, years later, are so similar to them! Even later in life, the quest for success never leaves our minds. But what is success?

These questions were beautifully answered by Swami Muktinathanand in the “Workshop on Ethics, Governance and Environment” session on 22^nd February, when he addressed the first year students at IIM Lucknow and spoke in detail about the human mind. Swami Muktinathanand is the President of the Ramakrishna Math.

A good mentor is worth an entire enemy

“This B-school is a citadel of learning with a difference where management science is coupled with management arts,” he began. Amidst tough deadlines and regular classes, we hardly realised this. IIM Lucknow has proved to be a B-school with a difference. At the entrance gate we see a huge sculpture of Arjuna conversing with his mentor, Krishna.

The Mahabharata tells that a good mentor is worth an entire army. While Duryodhana chose Krishna’s large army, Arjuna chose Krishna who vowed not to pick arms in the war. Arjuna realised that both sides had fearsome warriors. He needed a friend and a guide which he found in Krishna, the master strategist. IIM Lucknow teaches this truth the moment you step inside. “Aham Brahmasmi” – Lord Krishna, my soul, the Brahm truth of my life.

Success and CV points!

In times to come, in the words of Swamiji, we all will become successful. But success is that which is sustainable. The last chapter, last verse of the Bhagwad Gita says,

“yatra yogesvarah krsno
yatra partho dhanur-dharah
tatra srir vijayo bhutir
dhruva nitir matir mama”

Wherever there is Krishna, the master of all mystics, and wherever there is Arjuna, the supreme archer, there will also certainly be opulence, victory, extraordinary power, and morality. You will build up talent.

Know how to use your talent

However, talent is meaningless if you don’t know how to use it. You will be like Karna who is remembered as a great warrior but the murderer of Abhimanyu and the evil man who ordered the disrobing of Draupadi.

Use the right model at the right time

In Strategic Management, we learnt this. This learning roots back in the days of the Kurukshetra war when Krishna let Ghatotkach die so that Karna would not be able to use his Shakti astra to kill Arjuna. Krishna let Abhimanyu die in violation of all laws decided for the war so that even the Pandavas could break the laws to kill Duryodhana, Karna and Drona.

Swamiji says that in these two years, we will receive enough exposure for creating wealth for ourselves. But we need to learn optimisation of resources under given constraints. However, there will be little exposure for mastering our wisdom. We should remember the teachings of this two hours talk. “It is like a seed to be germinated throughout these two years and when you leave it will be a plant. In future the tree will breathe peace, success and joy. You will become a Rajarshi, an excellent administrator with rich knowledge, ethical conduct and professional success.”

Yes, the Puppies

The chalk hit my nose. The precision with which silence was torn open into a roar of laughter struck my ears like a sharp pin of embarrassment. Dilbert was giving a unique expression on the projector screen and the slide changed to “You never get a second chance… to make a first impression”. I rubbed my eyes to be startled by the irony of the moment.

Time was running slow, particularly on a day where the puppies got no breakfast. Indeed, service quality perception says, “failure is not an option”. Sad and dejected by my utter irresponsible behaviour, I turned towards the guy sitting next to me. Barely on his chair, resting on the edge of it his pen rushed with the speed of an airplane.

Morning quizzes no longer spoil my day… I’ve developed a strong immune system. But today’s one surely did the job. The bread leftovers that otherwise go inside the garbage bin usually serve to be the food for the ten little puppies near the big gnarled trunk of the huge oak tree. I woke up at 8 and rushed to Hall 1 for the Operations Management quiz at 8:10. The leftovers found their place in the bin. The slide changed, “Just In Time (JIT)”

I vividly remember the day when their tiny eyes looked at me and I couldn’t stop staring back. They seemed hungry. Barely could they move, they looked at me in search of consideration. I sighed… they won’t live, not all of them… I thought. The slide changed, “Prediction is very difficult especially if it’s about the future”

They grew up over the weeks. I watched them come out of their home, a slightly deep pit beside Hostel 4… I watched them gradually learn to eat, run, play… I watched as they learnt to share their food, to love each other, to enjoy the sun and to hold on to one another in the chilly, wintry nights…

I ran as fast as I possibly could. A big van waited near the gnarled trunk and a slight confusion rolled in the air. If not a JIT, I managed a SHIT (SomeHow In Time). The little puppies looked through the small iron openings from the van. The smallest of them was still holding on to her mother. The short and stout driver wore a once yellow t-shirt that loosely fitted him. His trousers were oversize and he looked somewhere in his mid-40s. He turned to look at me. The tilted smile on his dark and thick lips made a shiver run down my spine. He frowned and moved towards the tree. The mother watched as her little puppy was snatched away from her. The oak tree stared in silent objection. His hands trembled as he carried the puppy, black with white dots. I saw the slight repentance in his eyes.

“How come when I want a pair of hands, I get a human being as well?” Strange, that I must remember Henry Ford at a time when I should mourn over the last bread pieces that the puppies couldn’t get… the little puppies that will grow up without a mother’s love. All the bread leftovers should have been thrown into the garbage bin… the puppies should have died and not see their mother wagging her tail as the van moved out of her sight.

The thick voice said, “To fail to plan means to plan to fail”. The chalk hit my nose again. Of all the things in the world… did I just dream about those filthy puppies??? Yes, the puppies.

The Man Who Made it all Happen

‘We see a potential and the story falls right in line with the human interest conflicts that we wish to explore. It is for this reason that we are willing to undertake the task.’ - Mr. Kamaljit S. Sood, Chairman of Thames River Press and Anthem Press.

"I surely do not have the words to explain how much I owe to my publishing team, especially to this one man, Mr. Sood. He's taught me everything from writing, to publicity, to faith and trust. He'd given this huge opportunity so that I could bring my story before the world. He is a philanthropist and above all, a great human being. There have been ups and downs throughout the journey of our book "The Female Ward", like there is in everything in life. Nevertheless, it has been an enriching experience with the team. This note is a small token of my respect for him and everything he's done for me."